LeeAnn G Taylor - Embracing the Mosaic Life

Trusting our broken pieces to the Ultimate Artist

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Doubt, Control and Rest

March 23, 2015 By LeeAnn G. Taylor

Have you ever wondered if God is real?

To some “good church-going Christians,” the thought of even asking that question may send them into a panic.

But while we may never verbally express this type of doubt, sometimes the way we live our lives is evidence of our struggle in this faith journey.

Real Life and Rest

I’ll share an example from my own life this week.

I’ve been blessed to be a part of a ladies Bible study at a local church and we’re currently using Priscilla Shirer’s video series and journal, Breathe, to dig deeply into the concept of the Sabbath rest.

Some of us are so busy going from one thing to the next each day that the idea of rest seems impossible. Others of us can’t let go of the perfectionistic tendencies and our desperate desire to have things just so.

God stopped. He rested. And He prescribes the same for you and me. ~ @PriscillaShirer #SabbathRest

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I was convicted that my lack of willingness to stop and rest is evidence of my lack of trust in God.

While I might be concerned about ALL. THE. THINGS. around the house, with Chuck and the kids, responsibilities at work, paying off debt, selling our house, plans for the future, etc., what I’m truly revealing is my lack of faith that He will redeem that “lost time” for those of us who have a production mindset.

What about you? Do you also struggle with trying to control your time or do you remember to have a mindset of rest?

What tips do you have for remembering to take time to rest your mind, your body, and your soul?


This post is part of Five Minute Friday {Real} where we’re given a writing prompt and encouraged to write for five minutes of free writing. It’s a beautiful community of women sharing their words and wisdom each week! This post contains affiliate links {full disclosure}. Income from the blog helps fund Eva, our sponsored child through Compassion International.

Be Still And Listen for the Whispers

September 5, 2014 By LeeAnn G. Taylor

At times it’s been through a whisper.

The Holy Spirit quietly prompting, reminding, rebuking, or refreshing my soul.

Growing up in a faith tradition where the concept of the Holy Spirit was often brushed past in Sunday School on even the best day, I’ve struggled as an adult to really listen to God’s voice in my life in the day-to-day.

Reading His word and gaining insight?

That’s where all those Sunday school lessons memorizing books of the Bible, learning how to use a Bible concordance, and studying for endless Bible Bowl questions comes in handy.

But listening, really listening for the voice of God in my life? Oh, that’s been a struggle.

Sometimes we need a reminder to be still and listen for God’s whispers in our lives.

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And so I post this verse on my computer screen at work, in my car on a colored index card, on the mirror in the bathroom, and anywhere else I need a reminder.

Be still.

Know.

Remember His promises.

Remember I’m His child, his masterpiece.

Trust His provision for my life.

Trust His protection for my children.

Surrender control.

And listen for the whispers.

Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10

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psalm 46:10

photo credit: Theophilos via photopin cc

This post is part of Five Minute Friday {Whisper} where we’re given a writing prompt and encouraged to write for five minutes of free writing. It’s a beautiful community of women sharing their words and wisdom each week! Also sharing with Faith & Fellowship and Essential Fridays. 

What about you? How do you listen for the Holy Spirit’s whispers in your life?

 

5 Ways To React to the Chaos of Motherhood

July 29, 2014 By LeeAnn G. Taylor

Last night I raised the white flag of surrender. The chaos of motherhood just about had me un-done.

5 ways to react to the chaos of motherhood

photo credit: Christina Spicuzza via photopin cc

After a busy morning at the office and an afternoon working from home, I was ready to wind down for the evening. My husband had life coaching sessions at the office all evening, so it was just me with the kids. Instead of the usual quick dinner of quesadillas or mac & cheese, I decided to try a new recipe.

First mistake.

The Sour Cream Layered Enchilada Casserole turned out like this:

recipe fail - enchilada casserole

In my 5 year old’s words…”ick, watery”. Despite the dish sharing all the same ingredients of other Mexican-style foods we love, the kids wouldn’t touch it.

While I was cooking said dinner, the kids managed to destroy Salem’s (previously clean) room in a matter of minutes. According to Salem, her horses were ill and needed “doctoring”. Maybe we have a future veterinarian on our hands…or just a kid who likes to be in charge. Time will tell.

bedroom

Kai was not nearly as interested in helping the horses and instead preferred to ride them around her room before launching into his now famous “goodnight” song he’s composed on the guitar.

The lyrics are tough….”goooooood-niiiiiight, goooooood-niiiiiight, goooooood-niiiiiight” sung at the top of your lungs. While he seems to think it’s the perfect bedtime song, I’d think twice before screaming that at the top of your lungs to your child before bed. Just sayin’.

After heading back to the kitchen to check on dinner, all of a sudden I heard crying because Salem has fallen off of a box I’ve told her multiple times not to use as a stool and has a pretty nasty bruise and a little scrape on her leg. I sent her to get her own band-aid. 

Go ahead…I’ll wait while you give me the mom-of-the-year award!

Then the kids decided they’d rather hang out with me in the kitchen while dinner is cooking and pull out all our plastic dishware. You know, because they don’t have enough toys and “this is way more fun, mom.” Kai managed to make a pretty rad looking choo-choo train by stacking the cups on top of the bowls and Salem came behind him and turns his masterpiece into this:

plastic on floor

And now you can imagine the outcry from Kai. If you’re having trouble imaging, you haven’t heard a 2 year old pitch a fit lately. It’s epic. Cue 2 year old being sent to the corner for time out because tantrums are not an okay way to handle your frustration (and this momma just couldn’t handle the screaming anymore…).

Once dinner was done (and before I realized it was a total fail), I wrangled the kids up to the kitchen bar. Thankfully I convinced Kai to strap himself into his booster seat (because he’s way too big for me to strap him in…”me do it, mommy”) and in approximately 2.5 seconds after I gave the kids an alternate dinner of cereal and juice, this happened:

glass on floor

I snapped it quickly on my old iphone3, so you might need a little guidance as to what’s going on in the picture.

  • Notice the broken juice glass on the floor. Yes, it’s from my favorite set from Target from when we got married. 11 years later there are only 3 out of a set of 8 left. I’ll give you three guesses as to what happened to the rest of them. But I’d bet you can figure that one out on your own!
  • Notice the Cheerios on the floor. After the glass broke and while I was getting the broom, apparently Kai decided it’d be fun to toss Cheerios all over the kitchen like confetti. Hmm, I could think of lots of things more entertaining…if he’d only asked me first…
  • Notice the Cheerios ON HIS HEAD. No joke. He was putting the Cheerios on his head, then shaking his head to make them fall on the floor. I can’t make this stuff up people. What can I say, his name means “son of laughter”. Maybe he was just trying to live up to his daddy’s antics.

At this point in the evening I was just done. Over it. Ready to give up my “mother” title and hand it over to someone else.

But then, on top of everything else, I heard the words, “My tongue is fuzzy, mom.” Turns out that Salem had an allergic reaction to something she had eaten, so I couldn’t give up the “mom” title quite yet. One dose of Benadryl for her and a good sweeping of the kitchen floor later, I headed to put the little man to bed. At 7:00. Yes, I know, that’s not bedtime…but it was last night!

Things settled down after that and I took some time to clean up the kitchen. I turned on my favorite Pandora station for when I need to chill out (Aaron Keyes, if you’re wondering) and did the dishes. Nope, it wasn’t what I felt like doing, but it was the next task that needed to be done.

In reflecting on the utter chaos of the evening, I thought through all the ways I’ve handled the stress of motherhood on days like this in the past.

  • Scream and yell
  • Throw something (or at least I wanted to!)
  • Leave the room (or the house)
  • Give up and “check out” (aka: retreat to scrolling on Facebook or Twitter)

My some miracle, instead of resorting to one of these options last night, I waved the white flag of surrender and chose a better option.

I changed my perspective.

It’s time to wave the white flag of surrender in the midst of chaos and change our perspective.

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Instead of viewing the chaos through the lens of frustration, I chose to re-frame the situation and focus on the positive. Gratitude can do wonders for your mindset!

  • Sure, the new recipe was a bust, but at least we had other food in the house to eat.
  • Yes, Salem’s room is a mess, but it’s filled with toys and books we’ve received as gifts from others.
  • Yep, that was one of my favorite glasses that’s now smashed to pieces and there are probably still stray Cheerios hiding under the breakfast bar in the kitchen, but at least the kids didn’t get hurt and messes can be cleaned up.
  • It’s definitely frustrating that Salem can have an allergic reaction to food and I have no idea what caused it, but I’m thankful it wasn’t a serious reaction and she’s otherwise a healthy kiddo.
  • And yes, I was exhausted after all of this chaos (I’m growing a baby too, remember!), but I cleaned up the kitchen anyway because a tidy house equals a calm momma in the morning and I’d like to start off the next day well.

Adjusting our perspective seems simple enough, but it can be SO HARD to do in the moment. 

God’s been growing me in this area for at least the last year. This re-adjusting, re-framing, and re-evaluating of each situation is a process that’s breaking me into a million pieces.

Because my autopilot response to chaos is frustration and anger. The kind of anger that stems from an “I don’t deserve this” attitude. And while anger itself isn’t sin, my reaction to it…well, it was…and still is at times.

Currently this is the verse playing over and over in my mind. I’m learning that God’s word is the only anecdote to my fleshly reaction to chaos in the everyday.

Don’t be conformed to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds so that you can figure out what God’s will is—what is good and pleasing and mature. Romans 12:2

I’m excited to start sharing more of this journey I’ve been on related to gaining perspective in the midst of our everyday situations. There are so many tools, resources, and strategies we can use to maintain a healthy perspective and I can’t wait to share them with you!

Are you interested in following along? Sign up in the sidebar for blog updates & you’ll be the first to know when the “Power of Perspective” content is published.

Already with me on the journey? What are some ways you maintain a healthy perspective in the middle of your chaotic life? Share in the comments and let’s encourage one another.

Sharing with Holly at Testimony Tuesday, Holley at Coffee for your Heart, Jennifer at Tell His Story, The Mommy Club, Woman 2 Woman, and Mom’s Library.

I Need You: A Challenge to Radically Trust God

July 16, 2014 By LeeAnn G. Taylor

At midnight last night my husband Chuck quietly arrived in our bedroom after a long day of work. He scooped up our 5 year old, who had managed to snuggle up next to me close enough that I had just a sliver of our king sized bed to myself, and he deposited her back into her bed.

As usual, as he was getting ready for bed I asked about the highlights of his day because, let’s be honest, what else am I going to remember at midnight about his day? Midnight, especially for a pregnant momma just awoken from a deep sleep, is not the time to be having deep conversations.

Except that last night, we did.

In the middle of sharing his daily highlights, he remembered a text he got from me yesterday:

“Can we have another money conversation? I need some help talking out a mindset & cash flow change please.” 

So, at midnight last night Chuck and I had one of “those talks.” Dave Ramsey calls them “budget committee meetings” and I call them frustrating.

In our house, I’m the saver and Chuck’s the spender, meaning I do the budget and pay the bills and pay attention to all things money, then we talk once a month about how we’re doing. Except that lately, there’s not been much to talk about. It’s the same thing every month.

The budget doesn’t balance. We use the credit card to “float” gas, groceries, and other expenses not otherwise drafted from our account. We try to pay it off each month. And we pray God provides to cover the gap and any unexpected expenses.

Because it’s been like this for at least 18 months or longer, we don’t have much to talk about in our budget meetings. But around the 15th of the month (not coincidentally my payday) I at least am looking at the expenses and trying to figure out if we can pay what we charged on the credit card that month and whether or not by some miracle (literally) we are able to pay on the balance we’re still carrying from 2013.

This is why budget meetings frustrate me. It feels like we’re stuck. We have dreams of financial freedom & of opportunities to serve and bless others in big ways.

Chuck’s business is doing well, but at this point, it’s just paying for itself. I got a promotion and a raise at the beginning of the year, but it’s still not enough to make the budget balance. I even got a side job working as a virtual assistant at night a few hours a week and that has helped some. But in the end, the amount coming in doesn’t match the amount scheduled to come out. It’s a frustrating place to be.

budget

photo credit: kenteegardin via photopin cc

So back to the mindset change I mentioned. For months and months our plan of action has been the same.

  • Get paid.
  • Tithe.
  • Pay autodrafts with checking account.
  • Use credit card to “float” other expenses.
  • REPEAT.

Through it all, Chuck has challenged me to trust God on his promise to provide:

“My God will meet your every need out of his riches in the glory that is found in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19

My God will meet your every need out of his riches in the glory that is found in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19

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Over and over again I have seen proof of God’s faithfulness. The stories of blessings we have received at just the right time are numerous. But through it all, my heart has not been quite right. Yes, I’ve grown in trusting God to provide for our needs, but in the back of my mind, there was always the “safety net” of the credit card, floating along our expenses for a few weeks until I got paid again. As a result, I’ve not been trusting Him fully. 

And so, our midnight talk last night involved me trying to explain the math to Chuck while laying in the bed instead of showing him on the computer (bad move on my part…he’s a visual guy) and then sharing my heart about needing to trust God fully…meaning no more credit card.

Dave Ramsey would be proud!

Practically, this will mean those expenses we put on the credit card for this past month won’t get paid and we’ll instead start only using my income for all expenses starting tomorrow.

No more floating. No more trusting in a piece of plastic instead of the God who created me. 

Instead, I will hold onto this:

Proverbs 3:5-6 (CEB)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart;
    don’t rely on your own intelligence.
Know him in all your paths,
    and he will keep your ways straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord

photo credit: duncan via photopin cc

God says he will provide for our needs and TELLS me not to use my own intelligence. The credit card? Yep, that’s using my own intelligence. 

Instead of spending my time using my own intelligence to try to “figure things out” with our budget, maybe I’d be more successful if I obeyed His word and instead trusted in HIM with all my heart.

This next month, I’ll be focusing on knowing Him in ALL my paths and trusting that the path before our family will be kept straight.

My job? Trust Him.

His job? Provide for our needs.

So here it goes. I’m jumping all in. No more credit card. No more relying on me.

As seems appropriate, I’m sharing this song for Worship Wednesday:

Lord, I Need You – written by Matt Maher and performed by Kristian Stanfill

If you’re reading in an email, click here to view the video. The 3 minutes you spend allowing this message to resonate in your heart will transform your day. Promise.

Lord, I come, I confess
Bowing here I find my rest
Without You I fall apart
You’re the One that guides my heart

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You

Where sin runs deep Your grace is more
Where grace is found is where You are
And where You are, Lord, I am free
Holiness is Christ in me

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You

Teach my song to rise to You
When temptation comes my way
And when I cannot stand I’ll fall on You
Jesus, You’re my hope and stay

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You

You’re my one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You

Sharing this post at Three Word Wednesday {Simply Beth}, Wedded Wednesday, Wholehearted Home, Coffee for Your Heart, #TellHisStory, Works for Me Wednesday, and Recommendation Saturday.

What about you? Are you struggling to trust God in all things like me?

Share in the comments so we can encourage one another or if you feel more comfortable, email me at contact(at)leeanngtaylor(dot)com. I’d love to hear your story and pray for you as we journey together in learning to trust God more.

 

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